April 28, 2020,
Today and tomorrow will never be like yesterday.
Especially the good times.
We have to get used to that. Throughout time people had always had to get used to that.
Forget about the bad times.
All we need to do is look into our family’s past.
We will share the memories of some in our circle with you.
Nadine, now middle aged, can remember when their extended families used to get together once a month, every month for family gatherings, BBQ’s and house parties. The greatest celebrations were for birthdays, national memorials and annual holidays.
They were fun.
You really got a chance to know your cousins and extended family well, in your childhood.
The families were together and divorce was such a taboo. It certainly was no celebration of liberation and freedom or seeing your child once a week.
Nadine stated they really felt sorry for one of their relatives if they were divorced.
Today you would have to feel sorry for about fifty percent of your relatives.
As posted by the American Psychological Association, “In Western cultures, more than 90 percent of people marry by age 50. Healthy marriages are good for couples’ mental and physical health. They are also good for children; growing up in a happy home protects children from mental, physical, educational and social problems. However, about 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce. The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher.”
So much for large family gatherings every month in Nadine’s circle.
As she was having a conversation with her father before he was afflicted with dementia, they both related about how during those times, since that seemed to be normal in most families, they didn’t know how good they had it.
Now those times are gone.
Forever.
Tessa relates that when she was younger in her small town they didn’t lock the doors to their homes. She lived in a neighborhood where everyone knew one another and felt very safe.
The Clutter murders changed that for a nation.
In Cold Blood is a non-fiction novel by American author Truman Capote, first published in 1966, it details the 1959 murders of four members of the Herbert Clutter family in the small farming community of Holcomb, Kansas.
Mr. Capote learned of the quadruple murder before the killers were captured, and he traveled to Kansas to write about the crime.
He was accompanied by his childhood friend and fellow author Harper Lee, and they interviewed residents and investigators assigned to the case and took thousands of pages of notes. Killers Richard Hickock and Perry Smith were arrested six weeks after the murders and later executed by the state of Kansas.
Mr. Capote ultimately spent six years working on the book.
In later would become a widely watched successful film.
Breakfast at Tiffany’s is a 1961 American romantic comedy film directed by Blake Edwards and written by George Axelrod, loosely based on Truman Capote‘s 1958 novella of the same name.
The film starred Audrey Hepburn and George Peppard, and featured Patricia Neal, Buddy Ebsen, Martin Balsam, and Mickey Rooney.
Ms. Hepburn’s portrayal of Holly Golightly as the naïve, eccentric café society girl is generally considered to be one of the actress’s most memorable and identifiable roles. Hepburn regarded it as one of her most challenging roles, since she was an introvert required to play an extravert.
Breakfast at Tiffany’s was received positively at the time, and won two Academy Awards: Best Original Score and Best Original Song for “Moon River“, which was also selected as the fourth most memorable song in Hollywood history by the American Film Institute in 2004.
Moon River is such a beautiful song even today. Please enjoy it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EUO34CiTA4o
It demonstrates an important point.
Yes it was an exceptional film but what impressed us the most is how times have changed in terms of how people dress and behave in a civilized way.
Not all, but much of that seems to be a lifestyle of yesterday.
And yet amid all of this change we can’t give up. Some way, somehow we have to remain positive and full of hope and life.
We know it is hard.
Is it possible there is still a utopian future in front of us?
We hope so.
What we’ve learned in our circle is that we have to find ways to create positive new normals to surpass the previous normal that are gone and will never occur in mass again.
If you are young, are there new positive traditions that you can create with your children, family and friends?
Are there new dishes you can dream to cook up?
There can be.
During this current overly depressing pandemic is it possible that some of our great traditions that we have immensely enjoyed in the past may be changed or altered forever?
The NBA already canceled the rest of their season. Today is April 28, 2020. Will this year’s NCAA and NFL seasons be cancelled? Can we imagine going through the fall and winter without them?
In our circle we used to have a grand family tradition where on Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s.
We would gather for incredibly delicious home cooked meals, enjoy one another’s company and watch one football after another, yelling and screaming at the televisions (yes plural) with such passion.
Will that also be a permanent yesterday?
We sure hope not.
It is so important now than ever to keep creating a positive new normal, if only for yourself.
All of our mental health and well-being depends upon it. We can’t give up or give in. We have to keep hope.
One of the other pathways that can help you navigate the future with a more positive outlook is to create a very important purpose in life. We find out a lot about ourselves during tough times. Will we become bitter, angry, blame and act out upon others and society or will we adhere to the most important principles and high standards that made our society so great?
President John F. Kennedy made this clear with a strong reminder.
During his inaugural speech on January 20, 1961, he uttered the challenge, “And so, my fellow Americans: ask not what your country can do for you — ask what you can do for your country.”
Its simple meaning was to challenge society to contribute to improve the public good.
Right now isn’t that one of our greatest challenges and responsibilities?
Tomorrow will never be like yesterday. The present and future never like the past.
Having said that, if we keep a hopeful and determined spirit to help improve the lives of ourselves and others, we will receive one of the grandest rewards that we ever hope for.
A better tomorrow.
A better new normal.
~ ~ ~
OPENING PHOTO fciwomenswrestling.com femcompetitor.com, fcielitecompetitor.com Paramount Pictures photo credit
https://www.apa.org/topics/divorce/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_Cold_Blood
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breakfast_at_Tiffany%27s_(film)
https://medium.com/open-source-communities/ask-not-what-your-community-can-do-for-you-b26546197a35
https://fciwomenswrestling.com/
https://www.fcielitecompetitor.com/