Femcompetitor.com, grapplingstars.com, fciwomenswrestling.com, fcielitecompetitor.com, fciwomenswrestling2.com Shutterstock-Andrea-Raffin-photo-credit-Editorial-use
April 13, 2024,
Early on, you saw things going a certain way.
Very clearly.
From your support systems to the trending evidence, it seemed to be a certain indicator that what you saw, was accurate. Was certain to happy. It made you so happy.
Then something changed.
Completely out of your control.
It was so hard to take because the future that you once saw so clearly, is no longer possible.
You now have a choice.
You can misguide and delude yourself that it is still going to happen. Or? Perhaps painfully so.
You must adjust your thinking.
To the new reality that you are facing.
Perhaps an example.
We can’t say enough about how we knew people who invested heavily in California real estate. The prices just kept going up. The problem was, they didn’t pay cash for it, so they were mortgaged to the hilt. Still, with pricing going up, they had a vision of a very prosperous future.
Then the 2008 housing market crashed.
Now, mostly what they had was hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt.
They absolutely had to adjust to a new reality.
They had to adjust their thinking.
Jobs were lost.
Finances were destroyed.
Marriages ended.
Let’s turn to film.
I Am Love is a 2009 Italian romantic drama film directed by Luca Guadagnino, set in Milan around the year 2000.
Tilda Swinton plays a rich industrialist’s wife who has an affair with a chef. It is the first installment in Guadagnino’s self-described Desire trilogy, preceding A Bigger Splash (2015) and Call Me by Your Name (2017). Producers Swinton and Guadagnino developed the film together over an 11-year period.
The film is amazing and those years of hard work shows.
Aside from a few minor differences, the Recchi family are largely based on the aristocratic Castellini Baldissera family, whose properties and ancestral homes were used as the set for the film. Piero Castellini Baldissera appears in a cameo role multiple times throughout the film.
A little background should place this film in context.
The wealthy Recchi family are first and second-generation textile manufacturers in Milan.
Tancredi Recchi (Pippo Delbono) and his wife Emma (Swinton) are hosting a formal dinner party for Tancredi’s ailing but still-formidable father, Edoardo Sr. (Gabriele Ferzetti), patriarch and founder of the family business, who is celebrating his birthday. As the many servants bustle about, the family note with disappointment the news that Edoardo Jr. (Flavio Parenti), Tancredi and Emma’s eldest son, lost a racing competition the day of his grandfather’s birthday.
Edoardo Jr. arrives from that competition, having informed the family that he has invited a girlfriend. She is Eva, of the prominent Ugolini family, whom he plans to marry.
What we loved about the film was that it takes you into a realm where most of us will never walk. In some ways it is hard to comprehend how these large powerful families exist. If there was ever a film that will make you feel like you are on the inside, this one is it.
What we also felt is that it is a life you cannot escape, without severe consequences.
Part of that revolves around the expectations.
Of the wife.
The children.
The company.
To break away from those expectations will be excruciating.
So, the expectation is that things will continue and go according to plan.
Or else.
But, as we know, that’s now how life works. Here?
The wife falls in love with a chef and eventually leaves her wealthy marriage.
The family business is sold to expand into the global realm.
One of the sons meets an unfortunate fate.
With one of the children, the expectation of a grandchild will not be met.
And so it goes. Now?
There has to be massive adjustments in expectations and thinking.
The master movie reviewers at rogerebert.com summarize, “The Recchi family has been living in a particular way for a long time. Cushioned by great wealth, working in an industry associated with style, never challenged, well-educated, its hungers cloaked in tradition, it occupies its place of privilege effortlessly.”
As the family transitions into new expectations and disappointments, effortlessly is a word of the past.
Ready to walk over to the bookstore?
The Expectation Gap: Change Your Expectations to Transform Your Relationships Paperback – May 22, 2023
By Jamie Hallman (Author)
“There is often a major gap between the expectations we hold and the reality of what we experience. This gap is what causes so much of the discomfort and discontentment we feel, especially within our relationships. The Expectation Gap is your guide to bridging this divide. In a world flooded with vague self-help advice, this book stands out by providing not just the “what” and “why” of self-improvement but also the crucial “how.”
Written in an engaging and conversational tone, this book adeptly navigates complex topics, ensuring ease of understanding. It transcends vague encouragement, providing specific insights into how expectations influence relationships, providing a compelling reason to desire and initiate change. Blending science, psychology, personal anecdotes, and biblical principles, this book embarks on a captivating journey, shedding light on this essential aspect of relationships, providing both clarity and depth.
It’s not just a book; it’s an immersive experience that sparks a mindset shift. As you complete the application exercises and apply the principles within, you’ll undergo a transformation in your relationships, creating a ripple effect that extends into every aspect of your life.
Say goodbye to generic advice and embrace a journey of self-discovery and improvement with The Expectation Gap. It’s time to bridge the gap between what you expect and what you experience. Are you ready for the change?”
Very well stated.
Expectations, disappointments and reality are the road markers in this life’s journey.
It is important to have high expectations and strong achievement goals.
It is just when those expectations may not be met that, instead of becoming angry, resentful, stubborn and unyielding, perhaps it is time to take a deep breath, remove ourselves from the situation and begin to adjust our thinking.
It will help us transition from what was, to what we hope our new future to be.
~ ~ ~
OPENING PHOTO Shutterstock-Andrea-Raffin-photo-credit-Editorial-use Femcompetitor.com, grapplingstars.com, fciwomenswrestling.com, fcielitecompetitor.com, fciwomenswrestling2.com
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Am_Love_(film)
https://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/i-am-love-2010
https://www.fciwomenswrestling2.com
https://www.fcielitecompetitor.com/
https://fciwomenswrestling.com/
