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April 22, 2020,
Time machines, Time Tunnels and Time Portals have been the fascination of humankind for decades.
Especially in the movies.
Why?
Many reasons. A chance to redo history. A chance to meet famous people that you admired. A chance to live in a time period that you greatly desired.
What is the operative word here? That’s right, chance.
In many ways we’re looking for a second chance. A chance to make something right that we did very wrong when we young. A second chance to live a life that we were supposed the first time around as opposed to the disappointing one that we currently find ourselves in.
In a true story, while attending a fully competitive female wrestling event in Las Vegas, one of the female wrestlers we interviewed told us that she had a chance to pursue a scholarship in New York City, decided not to and instead remained in a relationship in Las Vegas for love.
It wasn’t what she said.
It was how she said it. She smiled and said it with an “Oh well, that’s the way it goes” deflecting smile.
We weren’t smiling.
Now it is her life but we couldn’t help but think that she lost an important dream.
First of all, what kind of person that she was then in a relationship with would even remotely ask her to not pursue that scholarship? We would become extremely disappointed with her if she didn’t. Knowing that our relationship was probably going to end.
That’s okay.
If we truly cared about her, we would want the best for her.
Luv Las Vegas, we do. But not like that. Not like a scholarship opportunity to live in New York.
We think about her from time to time and you know what?
Under different circumstances she would be a complete star. Seriously folks. She’s gorgeous. We won’t give too many clues away because she is a real person and we’ve written a major article about her.
We of course left that part out.
What about you. If you were in a relationship with this sensuous vibrant young woman and after years of hard work in high school, she earned a scholarship to New York City. How would you respond to that?
Would you encourage her to go, explaining that you will still keep in touch, but knowing that it will most likely end your relationship?
Or would you talk her out of it?
Very sad story in our opinion.
That day, this beautiful girl was wrestling in a small room where she could get injured for $100 a match.
What kind of money would she be making after completing her education in New York?
Enough of that story.
There are so many other stories out there. Many are too private and personal even to camouflage here.
That’s why we have the movies.
Kramer vs. Kramer is a 1979 American legal drama film written and directed by Robert Benton, based on Avery Corman‘s novel.
The brilliant film stars Dustin Hoffman, Meryl Streep, Jane Alexander and Justin Henry.
It tells the story of a couple’s divorce, its impact on their young son, and the subsequent evolution of their relationship and views on parenting.
It is also about the possibility of a second chance.
The film explores the psychology and fallout of divorce and touches upon prevailing or emerging social issues such as gender roles, women’s rights, fathers’ rights, work–life balance, and single parents.
Kramer vs. Kramer was theatrically released on December 19, 1979, by Columbia Pictures.
It was a major critical and commercial success, grossing $106.3 million on an $8 million budget, becoming the highest-grossing film of 1979 and receiving a leading nine Oscar nominations at the 52nd Academy Awards, winning five: Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actor (for Hoffman), Best Supporting Actress (for Streep), and Best Adapted Screenplay.
That our friends is doing it right the first time.
The storyline goes, Ted Kramer (Dustin Hoffman) is a workaholic advertising executive who has just been assigned a new and very important account.
Ted arrives home and shares the good news with his wife Joanna (Meryl Streep) only to find that she is leaving him. She leaves Ted to raise their son Billy (Justin Henry) by himself. Ted and Billy initially resent one another as Ted no longer has time to carry his increased workload, and Billy misses his mother’s love and attention. After months of unrest, Ted and Billy learn to cope and gradually bond as father and son.
Fifteen months after she walked out, Joanna returns to New York to claim Billy, and a custody battle ensues.
In regards to second chances, Meryl Steep’s character was fighting to get her son back after leaving him and her husband the first time around.
It appeared that she wanted a second chance to do things right, not with her husband, but with her son.
She won the custody battle.
When push came to shove, our interpretation is that she realized that she was too selfish to raise the boy herself and tearfully decided to let him stay with his father.
Therein seems to be a very important point.
Why do we often need a second chance?
Because the first time around, we made a mistake.
The second time around are we going to own up to the mistakes that we made and change without blaming others?
Here, Joanna was wise to let the boy stay with his father. That appeared to truly be in the boy’s best interest. She seem to finally recognize the real reasons (yes plural) why she left in the first place.
Life tends to give us second chances. We all need that.
Most times.
Some times.
Our female wrestler, as told above, will never get a second chance to be young again, make good on that scholarship offer and move to New York.
Too bad.
She can pursue another important dream and not behave the way she did regarding her New York adventure when she gets near the goal line. One of the important lessons that we see from a distance is that higher self-esteem is to put yourself first. What the other person in the relationship wants is not the priority.
It is about what you want.
Will the decision to pursue your dream come with pain? Most likely, but the emotional rewards will far out weight the pin pricks.
During this current pandemic, most of us have a lot more time on our hands than before.
Even after we wash them with soap.
Even if we lost opportunities previously, life will have a tendency to give us a second chance.
Unconnected to the pandemic, which is no single person’s fault, still, when we analyze our past and look into our future, which we have more control over than we think, it is important to analyze and understand that if you get a second chance to pursue a different life, even if you are forced to, perhaps view it as an opportunity to take steps to understand what you truly want this second time around and make the most of your golden second chance.
Your Time Machine is now pointing towards the future.
Please pull the lever.
~ ~ ~
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kramer_vs._Kramer
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