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November 30, 2023,
When it comes to money, we’re told, there are basically two types of people in the world.
Savers and spenders.
Which group do you fall into?
We have seen some intriguing online videos about people (primarily young), who spend way beyond their means, load up on credit card debt and make the minimum payments on all of the colossal interest they are accumulating.
What are their reasons for doing so?
They say, I’m worth it.
We really love that one because, according to your finances, actually you’re not worth it. As least if we are analyzing what worth actually means. We know what they are saying speaks to, in their minds, their value as a person but actually, it appears to be more of a sign of low self-esteem.
Why do you need the fancy sports car you cannot afford?
Why do you need to dress in designer threads?
Why do you need to shop at the most expensive stores?
Is it possible a person behaves that way because they are overly concerned about what others think?
As we often love to do, we will share an experience from someone in our circle.
Before Thad was married, he never carried any debt. In fact, it wasn’t until Thad traveled to a foreign country at 25 years old, then he applied for and received his first credit card. A friend suggested that he do that because otherwise, in the credit world, which is incredibly important, they don’t know who you are. You see, it is not the grades on your college transcripts that are important, it is your credit score.
Made sense to Thad.
He would soon marry a women who made it clear to him, he was a loser if that couldn’t buy a certain type of house and that he didn’t make enough money.
This is actually very common in today’s world.
So, to speed the story up, to make his wife happy, Thad began buying things he could not afford, and the bills and interest rates began to pile up. Eventually Thad lost his job, couldn’t pay his bills and his wife left him. No therapy, no working things out, one day he came home from his lower paying job that he eventually secured, and she was gone.
Very true story.
We glean, the thinking with spenders is that appearances and the ability to buy high end purchases speaks to their self-worth.
Let’s have an expert weigh in.
The informative team at psychologytoday.com surmise, “Money is much more than dollars and cents. It’s about power, about emotions, about needs.”
How true that sounds.
Then there are the savers.
Is it possible that some people save too much and don’t enjoy life in the present? They are so concerned about the future but, as we know from life experience, there is no guarantee they will be there. They are so frugal and willing to do without, that if you are in a relationship with them, while you may be financially secure, you may not be enjoying life.
There has to be balance.
The good news about savers is, instead of always living in the moment, they are more concerned with having a substantial amount of money for when they need it. For necessities. For emergencies.
Too, if family members need something or teens want to feel cool and admired by their peers, within reason, they will have the money to get them those things.
All said and done, we tend to side with the savers.
Time to walk over to the bookstore.
The Psychology of Money: Timeless lessons on wealth, greed, and happiness Hardcover – March 2, 2021
By Morgan Housel (Author)
“Doing well with money isn’t necessarily about what you know. It’s about how you behave. And behavior is hard to teach, even to really smart people.
Money―investing, personal finance, and business decisions―is typically taught as a math-based field, where data and formulas tell us exactly what to do. But in the real world people don’t make financial decisions on a spreadsheet. They make them at the dinner table, or in a meeting room, where personal history, your own unique view of the world, ego, pride, marketing, and odd incentives are scrambled together.
In The Psychology of Money, award-winning author Morgan Housel shares 19 short stories exploring the strange ways people think about money and teaches you how to make better sense of one of life’s most important topics.”
Very informative.
We sense that book is more about what is going on inside your head. A very important place to start.
Let’s look at another from a structural standpoint.
How To Save Money: A Guide to Spending Less While Still Getting The Most Out of Life (-) Hardcover – October 24, 2023
By Ann Russell (Author)
“With the recent cost of living crisis, we are all looking for ways to cut bills and save money. Ann Russell, who is best known as “TikTok’s Auntie”, has lived much of her life on a tight budget, and since energy bills first started rising, has been answering fan’s questions not just about cleaning but about all kinds of ways to economise.
Following on from her first book, How To Clean Everything, in How To Save Money Ann will share her advice on the best ways to save money and cut back in all sorts of areas, covering everything from budgeting to meal planning and reducing food waste, and from tips on spending less each month to the most energy efficient ways to heat your house, do your laundry etc.
Written with Ann’s trademark warmth, humour and understanding, this is a book that will help everyone who is looking to spend less while still getting the most out of life.”
Sounds very practical. Structural even.
We love the insight and balance of both books.
Money is not the most polite subject to talk about, but within a relationship, a very important one.
As the old expression goes, it is not how much you make, it’s how much you spend.
We’ll amend that and say, how much you make is important too but it will last longer if you live within your means.
Finding balance with your money is about planning for the future but absolutely enjoying life now, in the moment.
We are confident that you can find the balance.
~ ~ ~
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