Do we take for granted that friends will always be loyal?

Loyalties are most likely conditional.

Here is an example of the epitome of loyalty.

Dave is a 1993 American political comedy film directed by Ivan Reitman, written by Gary Ross, and starring Kevin Kline and Sigourney Weaver. Frank Langella, Kevin Dunn, Ving Rhames, and Ben Kingsley appear in supporting roles. article, warner brothers photo credit

Dave Kovic (Kevin Kline) runs a temporary employment agency in Georgetown, Washington, D.C., and has a side job impersonating President Bill Mitchell. He is requested by Secret Service agent Duane Stevensen to make an appearance as the President at a hotel. Dave assumes it is a matter of security, but it is really to cover up Mitchell’s extramarital affair with a White House staffer.

President Mitchell suffers a severe stroke during the rendezvous, leaving him in a coma. White House Chief of Staff Bob Alexander and Communications Director Alan Reed convince Dave to continue impersonating the President.

Dave does such a great job of impersonating the President that he wins so many over and the epitome of an expression of loyalty is when one of his secret Service men expresses with sincerity that even though he knows Dave is not the President, he would take a bullet for him.

Now that is loyalty.

“Honesty and loyalty are key. If two people can be honest with each other about everything, that’s probably the biggest key to success.”… Taylor Lautner

Here is a question for you.

Is loyalty really a good thing? Should it be conditional? Is it mostly for those of low self-esteem?

At we get the definition and then the explanation and answer to our question. “ defines loyalty as “faithfulness to commitments or obligations”. I much prefer to think of loyalty in terms of commitments that are freely chosen, rather than obligations that have associations that are heavy, and bring up fears about being trapped. Because loyalty has so many positive benefits, it is a shame to be discouraged by the negative associations that can get in our way of moving into a higher level of well-being in our partnership. By realizing the huge benefits of cultivating loyalty as a signature strength, and seeing the many ways loyalty enhances our lives, our interest in and motivation to become adept in this area grows.”

Okay, we love the definition and yes, as you can guess, it is important to insert the word but.

In a July 2016 passage at they provide the but. “Loyalty encourages complacency.

Loyalty is inferior to whistleblowing. Many politicians and other leaders proudly assert that they look for loyalty in their advisors. Too often that means advisors who won’t rat them out.

People change. A monogamous partner could decide it’s time to play around. An employee could decide, “I’m tired of being responsible. I want to slack.” In such circumstances, should loyalty always be prioritized?

Situations change: A sense of loyalty often keeps employers from replacing a person who—all things considered—should be replaced.”

So, yes loyalty should be conditional even if we hope in certain situations that it never should be.

In our female grappling industry, one recruiter who commands great loyalty is Isamar Gutierrez. article, photo credit

Her Fem Competitors tend to be loyal because they love her and she gets them work.

She wrestles Daisy.

And Penny.

Also FeFe.

Don’t forget Olivia and others.

Their matches can be found at:

So yes we love loyalty but maybe we shouldn’t get offended if everyone (except for our dog) makes sure that their loyalty to us is conditional.

We just focused on loyalty in relationships but of course there is a much broader application.

Let’s turn our attention to a guest female writer as she expands our mind.

The Importance of Loyalty article, Chevanon Photography

By Susan Leigh

Being loyal is a characteristic that many of us value highly in others. I wonder how many of us are less than loyal in return. How much do we take pride in our own loyalty to others?

– Brand loyalty. Many of us are loyal to a particular shop, supplier, or service provider. We have built up a relationship of trust over the years and feel confident that they provide what we want and need. Children often insist on a particular brand of baked beans or make of cola drink. Logos and makes of clothes often make the difference between being cool and uncool, so loyalty can become associated with fitting in. As we get older brands can become a guarantee of quality and reliability. But the supplier has to be loyal too. If they keep putting up their prices or altering their terms of service customers can feel their loyalty being tested and they may start to vote with their feet and shop elsewhere.

– Keeping secrets. Loyalty can be tested when it comes to keeping secrets. It is not up to us to decide whether or not to pass on someone else’s confidences. We may be tempted to discuss the rights and wrongs of their situation or behavior and knowing something that others don’t can be very seductive to reveal. But being a good and loyal friend and ally means at times keeping their business to ourselves and letting them decide if they want to reveal it.

– Keeping arrangements. I’m sure many of us have had friends who have cancelled on the last-minute. Something unavoidable has come up and they can’t keep the arrangement. It is disappointing, especially if we later discover that they went instead to a party or had a special night out. Loyalty means making an arrangement and keeping it, not hedging bets to see if a better offer comes along.

– Keeping our integrity. If we have an opinion, a point of view that others find difficult to appreciate it may be tempting to modify it in order to fit in. However, this can be a valuable opportunity to remain loyal to our opinion whilst learning about different outlooks and views. Calmly explaining our reasons for feeling and thinking that way can be useful for everyone involved. It can be enlightening to share viewpoints and discuss them in a respectful way.

– Standing by our friend. If a friend is going through a bad time, is perhaps accused of something, but protests their innocence a loyal friend will stand by them, supporting them. Supporters groups feature in the press from time to time, collecting petitions, raising funds, standing by their man. They display the true definition of loyalty. However, even if our friend has done wrong we can still be supportive and loyal if we feel that we can trust their reasons for their mistake. Loyalty and trust often go together.

– Breakup situations. If a friend is left by their partner it is often a difficult time. As a consequence they may become stressed and offhand with us. They may shut off emotionally as they come to terms with the situation. Being a good loyal friend means understanding and simply being there for them when they need us. Breakups can cause friends to become divided in their loyalties. It can be tough and sometimes impossible to stay friends with both parties in these situations. Being caring, sensitive, discrete and supportive is what is needed at these times.

– Standing by our employer. Work situations are often areas where people forget that they are an overhead on the business. We all have to earn enough money to pay our wages and more. Money has to change hands in order for us to be paid. Appreciating that our boss has to manage the budgets and ensure that the business runs smoothly can result in us becoming more loyal and understanding of the situation.

Loyalty is an important part of our commitment to each other. It oils the wheels of daily life and enables us to respect those close to us and trust that we will treat each other with regard.

Susan Leigh is a Counsellor and Hypnotherapist who works with
– stressed individuals to promote confidence and self-belief,
– couples in crisis to help improve communications and understanding,
– with business clients to help support the health and motivation levels of individuals and teams

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Thank you Wikipedia for information of the film Dave

For more information see

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