To truly understand a person’s perspective, position and life experience, sometimes you’re admonished to walk a mile in their shoes.

When it comes to understanding the plight of very ambitious women, to walk a mile in her progressive shoes, tough guy or not, sometimes you’ll have to wear high heels.

Ambition and women is a discussion that might occur in university classrooms and other think tanks but rarely at hotels, dance clubs or pick up sports bars. article, photo credit

Let’s examine why.

Starting simple is best.

At the entertaining and informative site they relate, “If you want to insult a woman but sound like you’re paying her a compliment, there are a few ways you can do it. If she is not particularly attractive, you tell her she has beautiful hair. If she seems a little dim, you say, “You’re so nice!” And if you work with her and she’s pushy, or she’s grasping, or sharp-elbowed, or a land grabber, or simply annoying in a way you can’t put your finger on, you say, “You’re very ambitious.” Which is code for so many other things, nearly all of them bad.”

Do you agree with that summation?

“I’m an entrepreneur. ‘Ambitious’ is my middle name.”… Kim Kardashian

Describing a woman as ambitious is code for all things negative?

Master Yogi, more information is needed.

On September 2015 at the news and information giant they educate “We teamed up with fellow Time Inc. brand, Real Simple, to find out how women really feel about ambition in themselves and in others. Contrary to all the hand-wringing about confidence and motivation at work, our survey found that women were just about as ambitious as men, and that “ambitious” doesn’t necessarily have the same negative connotations as, for example, “bossy” does.”

Man or woman, who likes a bossy person? Bossy is always bad.

Here is what else they found. “Younger women are significantly more ambitious than older ones. 48% of women in their 20s said they were “very” or “extremely” ambitious, compared to only 26% of women over 60. Younger women are also less likely to say it’s okay to not be ambitious– almost 60% said it was “not so” acceptable or completely unacceptable to be unambitious, compared to 44% of women in their late 40s and 50s.”

The above makes a lot of sense.

We could inundate you with article after article and watch your eyes glaze over but here is what we’ve gleaned from our research.

When it comes to potential hook ups, men want to avoid the discussion of ambitious women. Hotels, Dance Clubs and Sports Bars are not ambitious women discussion think tanks.

When it comes to business or potential long term relationships, ambition in women is a great thing.

Fathers tend to want their daughters to be very ambitious so that she can not only support herself but have a great career and lifestyle. You can’t wait around for Prince Charming.

In the competitive female submission grappling industry, ambitious women are highly sought after and grandly welcomed.

Especially if she is a newbie.

She had better be ambitious.

We have two examples of matches at

Eden vs Olivia D’ Angelo article, photo

When you are brand new like Eden, to take on a San Jose tough girl like Olivia D’Angelo who has a reputation for demolishing new beauties who stare at her like a deer in head lights, is very ambitious. article, photo

Poppy vs Kait Snow

Poppy of Gilroy is a fresh faced cutie who decided to give wrestling a try. Her first test was against a sexy blonde road warrior named Kait Snow. We loved Poppy but sensed we were throwing her under the bus. To take on Kait, she had to be very ambitious. article, photo

There are so many examples of ambitious women in our industry who are willing to put their pride on the line, compete in front of an audience where they could get embarrassed but are ambitious enough to do it anyway.

To that we say Bravo!

We have a visiting female writer who is walking a mile in our shoes (high heels optional) and seems to agree that ambition is a great thing.

Ambitious Dreams Bring Inspiration — Shooting For The Moon article, photo credit

By Aislinn O’Connor 

The world is full of people who’re afraid of reaching for their dreams in case they’re disappointed.

A lot of parents teach their children to be modest in their expectations. It’s understandable for them not to want their sons and daughters to be hurt, so they teach them to have “reasonable” ambitions — to aim for the things they know are well within their capabilities. That way, they’ll avoid the pain of failure, or the embarrassment of having other people know they’ve failed.

The trouble is, a “reasonable” ambition dooms you to a life of mediocrity.

Just getting by is not abundant living. Doing a job you don’t enjoy, solely because it pays the bills and is considered socially acceptable, is not a definition of success or happiness.

Suppressing your real ambitions, talents, dreams and wishes is a recipe for unendurable frustration — and over time the pain of that frustration will get worse, not better.

Your particular mixture of interests, talents, dreams and inspirations is unique. It’s not appeared before in human history, and it won’t again.

That means that you (however unlikely it might seem right now!) can achieve something no-one else has ever done before you — and if you don’t go for it, no-one else can.

It might be years, or even centuries, before someone takes another route to make the same discoveries, to write the books, to sing the songs or sell the products that it lies within your power to achieve — and till that happens, the whole world must do without them. What’s so very “reasonable” about that?

If this sounds far-fetched, think of Thomas Edison. Born in 1847, this was a man who in all his life had only three months’ formal education, but he planned to make a light-bulb that could offer bright, safe light in people’s houses. Most people laughed at him. After all, it wasn’t “reasonable”.

At first he couldn’t do it, but he wouldn’t give up. He couldn’t, because he had a big, ambitious dream that went a long way further yet.

Once people had electric lighting in their houses, they’d need power — and once they had the power, they could use it, too, for other things, like heating, cooking, cleaning… even entertainment. Once he had his light-bulb, he could change the world.

It’s said he tried 10,000 times to make a light-bulb. When someone asked him how he felt about his many failures he replied, “I haven’t failed. I’ve ruled out ways that don’t work, that’s all. Each try brings me closer to the one that will.”

Eventually, he was rewarded — and with his light-bulb in production, set to work on even more ambitious dreams. Just a couple of his successes led to the beginning of the record industry and cinema.

Edison was granted over 1,000 patents — more than anyone in history. To this day that record’s not been broken. He formed a company to develop his inventions, and became one of the richest men in America.

What’s important is not just that he achieved the seemingly impossible, or even that he persevered despite 10,000 disappointments. What matters most is how he did it.

He had ambitious dreams that totally inspired him. They energized him. The knowledge of the benefits that he could bring the world, as well as to himself, fueled his commitment even when the road was hard. He wasn’t “reasonable”.

If you want to reach your goals, it pays to be creatively unreasonable.

Choose a dream that totally inspires you, one you can enjoy however hard the going gets.

Write down exactly what you’re aiming to achieve, and how it can help others (the way to get the things you want is to make sure other people get what they want, first — that’s the only way they’re going to pay you for your efforts).

Now list the steps you need to take to make that happen. Spend some time working on those tasks each day (you don’t need give your job up till you can afford to!), and watch the magic start to happen.

Above all, keep your outlook absolutely positive. Learn from your mistakes and adjust your plans accordingly, but remember the 10,000 light-bulbs and keep going.

See yourself always as on your way to great success. Thomas Edison succeeded — so can you.

The way to be quite certain that you’ll fail is not to try.

Shoot for the moon — for even if you miss, you’ll reach the stars.

Aislinn O’Connor is a motivational writer, and producer of personal empowerment audio tracks. To download a complimentary copy of her book, Your Daily Inspiration, visit

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OPENING PHOTO CREDIT Chevanon Photography

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